Smell Every Rose & Pet Every Mini Horse
Blogger: Sarah Safuto
Greetings and salutations, readers! Last time I wrote about how happy I was that I transferred to Occidental; today I'm going to talk about my senior year here thus far and how being a transfer student plays into my feelings about that.
I'll start off by saying that all those things that my relatives told me about it all “going by so fast” - those things at which I smiled very politely then brushed off in high school – are absolutely true. Now that I'm getting ready to submit my comps and staring the first round of senior-year-finals in the face, it has started to hit me how close I actually am to graduating.
I told someone a few weeks ago that I never know how to deal with endings. That I dread them more than anything. This is my current struggle as an almost-second-semester senior.
I wish I could say that I feel ready to be finished with school, that I'm ready for whatever life chooses to throw my way, that I breathlessly await my diploma so that I can leap forward into the unknown. I wish I could say that I've been tirelessly researching jobs and grad school programs that appeal to me. I can't. I can say, however, that I have spent a total of three hours this past week listening to ten different versions of “The Sound of Silence” on repeat while staring at my ceiling contemplating how fast time has gone by. Did you know that Simon & Garfunkel recorded ten different versions of “The Sound of Silence”? You do now.
Transferring in as a junior meant that this moment was going to happen sooner or later – as much I've tried to appreciate every second of the journey, to stop and smell every rose and pet every mini horse (I'm not over the fact that we had a mini horse on campus last month), it was inevitable that it would eventually hit me that I wanted more time at a place that I've enjoyed so much. But all of this anxiety about leaving makes me think of a quote from Winnie the Pooh - “How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”
How lucky I am indeed. I am so incredibly grateful to have connected so much with my classes, my professors, and my peers in the time that I've been here, and I cannot wait to make next semester the best one yet. Although it can feel like the start and the finish line are so close together as a transfer, it has only made me appreciate my experience here that much more. And I've finally started to understand that every ending is also a new beginning. And how can I be afraid of endings when there are so many more beginnings to be had?
Anyway, I hope during the stress of finals time you all stop to take a moment to smell the roses and count the good things in your life. And if you happen to see another mini horse, call me.